Catalog of Reflections

Brief observations on the words never and always.

A thoughtful client recently reminded me that I’d told her that it’s nearly impossible to feel negative emotions and breathe deeply at the same time. I love my clients. We learn so much from one another.

Got something really important to do, but you’re not sure where to start? You can distract yourself with bright and shiny objects—bright ideas and shiny enthusiasm for something that’s easier, simpler, and probably not as important as what you’re avoiding.

Tools for Transformation is a series of posts about improving your life, about using yourself, your community, and your resources to make a difference, to add meaning and grace, to explore new territory, and to have more fun. We’ll start with noticing. It’s the first step in initiating or responding to change.

Who in your life has confidence that’s greater than your doubt? Who loves you enough to tell you when you’re holding back? Find those people and thank them. And be that kind of friend or mentor in someone else’s life.  

Thinking about money leads one down some “rabbit trails” of imagination. What would you do if the money were taken care of? What would you leave behind? What would be different?  

Some days are foggy. Flights get cancelled. Traffic slows down. Not much choice: ready or not, life slows down. But every now and then, it’s nice to slow down and “feel your way” through an experience.

January is more than half over, and I’m noticing that I haven’t fulfilled my New Year’s resolutions. I’m beginning to realize that not deciding, not finishing, and keeping my options open are sneaky ways of not doing what I’m here to do on this planet.  

Grieving is a curious experience. I find myself feeling sad and tired. And then I find myself wanting to reach out and go for the gusto—do the things I’ve always wanted to do, go the places I’ve always wanted to go, live life to the fullest.

And in the process of telling stories, listening to stories, asking and answering questions, new stories emerge and lives are changed.

What’s wrong with being right is that we can’t always know what’s really right. And if we're too concerned with being right, we lose sight of just living our lives.  

“One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go‑o‑o‑o.” It’s a counting game that somehow seems to fit our ideas about showing our work as artists.

In the midst of all the gloom and doom, it’s artists who tell it like it is, and also get really creative about new possibilities. It’s artists who help us see the world and ourselves in new light.

Being acknowledged or thanked for doing something helpful or nice adds to the quality of the exchange. Makes the effort a little more worthwhile.

Perhaps the best way to be fully human is to experience the richness of life—the good, the bad, and the ugly. As sad as I am to watch dear friends wind down their lives, I’m equally grateful for the richness and grace that their lives have added to mine.

We all do things sometimes that make us feel stupid. But after we get past wondering how much "more stupider" we could possibly be, we find that risking failure is a way toward exploration, creativity, and innovation.

Being helpful is great, except when it's not. I’ve taken on some big jobs that in retrospect were other people’s projects. What I notice—mostly in retrospect—is that they were not my projects.

A few weeks ago, an odd series of experiences reminded me of the power of attention to change the way we see the world around us.

Getting it right the first time is definitely overrated. I’m pretty sure I’m right about this.

How would you prepare for success? What would need clearing and cleaning? How might you look at your life and your work differently if you were expecting success? How would your focus shift?

Cleaning up along the way makes sense. Coaching is one way to clean up old ideas and stories and expectations, making room for fresh possibilities and leading to surprising transformation.

What are the ideas, thoughts, and expectations that block what you really want? What would you have to give up in order to play full out, to go for a totally fabulous life?

She was fun, totally fun. Life was an adventure, a joy, something to relish with friends and loved ones. Until it wasn’t. Until it all came crashing in and it was too much.

What are the promises you’ve made? Look especially closely at your promises to yourself. Keep your word, and see if that doesn’t improve your life.

Monday mornings are tricky. If you get out on the wrong side of the bed, it can stay with you all week long. If you get off on the right foot, things fall into place and you breeze through your days. Sweet.

I read an odd little horoscope today, which said that it’s a time for me to pay attention to details. Fair enough, but then came the suggestion that I should consider measuring progress in inches. Oh my! Measuring progress in inches! Not such a great prospect for someone who just taught a workshop called “Moving…